spinners

I spent a lot of time in the gym in 2008. I’d really begun my gym routine back in May 2007, but fell off pretty hard in the 07-08 winter. I think it was March last year before I got my groove back, and lo and behold, I actually stuck to my guns! I was seriously committed, and really saw huge, positive changes in my life: my physique, energy levels, and emotional well being all took a turn for the better.

The holidays, of course, are a tough time to keep gym habits up. A bit of travel and a couple of minor colds, conspired to sabotage most of December. But fret not, fans! I’m already back on the wagon, as focused and determined as ever.

One thing on the agenda this year is to keep some variety in my gym mix. Not that I’ve been in a rut or anything, but I do sometimes feel bored, and if and when I do, those sessions tend to be lackluster. I don’t want any lackluster sessions!

Today, by mere chance, I got curious and poked my head into the spin room at my gym. Turns out, a spin class was about to start, and there were two open bikes left (according to the sign up sheet). So I said “what the heck!” and gave it a shot. Now, mind you, I haven’t even tried a spin class for probably over three years. But there I went.

It was fun. It was a good cardio and leg workout, and it was not too hard. I highly recommend trying a spin class if you haven’t done so lately. Good stuff.

For months years I have encouraged my mother to work out. In the last few years we’ve watched her mother gradually lose some of her mobility and seeing G-ma become more and more aged, I’ve begun to worry about my own mother’s health fading as she enters “seniority”. So I would nag her, “Ya know, Mom, you really should join a gym, go work out, lift weights…”. Twas totally effective. Nawt!

In August, my mom’s work situation changed and I told her “Hey, let’s start working out.” The bulk of the kudos goes to her cos when the ball was in her court, she totally charged ahead. We made plans and <gulp> actually headed to the gym.

Now I don’t know about you, but I was actually nervous about going to the gym (even though I’d been paying my membership fees for well over a year, all I’d ever done was go to pre-natal yoga). It has been many years since I’ve been in a gym working out and I felt intimidated by the machines and defeated by the “What will I do?”edness. Enter my awesome bro and my determined mother. Rick gave us a workout plan and Mom became the motivator. Since August we’ve worked out 2-3 times per week and progressed from the “Express” circuit workout to the Hammer machines and free weights. W00t!

The gym is a weird place. Our gym in particular is very family oriented and the people seem very suburban. Wade stands out (o yes, did I mention he goes to the gym too?) because he is one of the few men with a  beard. We’d both independently noticed this aspect of the gym-people tribe. It’s funny because there seems to be a strict aesthetic at this particular gym. While there, I listen to my wee ipod, which is filled with slamming underground hip-hop and energetic house music and the contrast between the visual (bland middle class peops) and aural (Immortal Technique, Invincible, The Presets) is often hilarious. I didn’t really appreciate my music player before, but now, WOW! There are some songs that get me so motivated and energized. It is so fun! I didn’t know before.

Another aspect of this experience is that we are trying to embrace it as something we’ll do for the rest of our lives rather than the “I’m gonna lose 20 pounds then everything will be perfect”-mentality. Toward that end I’m not really thinking about weight loss, but more of a pursuit of strength, developing musculature and ability. Tis paying off. My goal is that I’ll still be working out in a year – I may lose some weight – but mostly I want to be stronger, more fit and committed to developing my body for the rest of my life.

This past week we went hiking in the desert and I scrambled up some dry falls (& with a 18# baby strapped to my back!) that I would not have been able to do without help before. They were challenging but I made it up. Twas exhilirating to know that our work is paying off in concrete results that allow us more ability and strength. I definitely feel more balance and strength and resilience and that motivates me. Overall, I am so very glad that I took the leap and that I have the good fortune to have all the resources I need to make it a go. Yay!

One day a while back, she was showing off her literally empty email inbox. At the same time, I was feeling stressed out about the 230+ emails (maybe 30 unread) in my own inbox. I had not really made a serious attempt to empty it, as that was not a mental framework I had access to, and so was feeling that daily sense of dread and woe associated with so many loose ends. So after sharing my sad reality with Nancy, she took the time to school me on building my inbox system.

First, she said, make two new folders: Next Actions and Waiting On. Then, tend to everything that takes 2 minutes or less. Then, for items that require action but take more than 2 minutes, into Next Actions. Items which require actions from other, into Waiting On. Everything else should be deletable or archived. I did as I was told.

Within a week I went from 230 unread/unarchived emails to less than 10. Eventually I got that number close to zero, until I stumbled upon Inbox Zero, (watch the video) which cemented my mindset. For the past few weeks, nearly every day when I leave the office, my email inbox is literally empty. This means I have been more responsive to my colleagues and managers, and more on top of my personal responsibilities.

Shortly after I started this program, I found myself at a major corporate bookstore and wandered over to the Self Help section where I spotted David Allen’s Getting Things Done in audiobook format. I snatched it up and so began my actual move into the wider world of GTD (e.g. beyond my email).

It could not have happened at a better time, as my August was especially challenging due to my Burning Man expedition, along with evening classes, my gym program, work, and generally trying to be a good person.

I bought myself a tiny Moleskine notebook, which I used as my central location to note all my tasks, as well as to chronicle my daily expenditures. For the first time in my life, I stuck to my ‘to do’ tool without fail. I kept copious records. I got a massive amount of things done. I actually kept an accurate tally of my spending. And I did it all with minimal stress. After all, since I knew that I could count on my system, I didn’t wonder and worry late at night whether I had done what I needed to do that day, or if I would remember what I needed to do tomorrow. Peace of mind!

It is a wonderful feeling. But the best part is looking forward and considering how much better this month – and next – will be. I have so much to do, but now, finally, at last, I have the tools to really get done the things that are important to me – without stressing out or adhering to some awkward program.

In my current crusade to lead a more satisfying life, I have taken a number of steps, all motivated at least in part by the notion that I was not using my time as effectively as could, or as I want to. Here’s a partial list of things I’ve done in the last month

• Canceled my cable
• Got rid of my TV
• Made a list of goals
• Bought a digital watch
• Put up a cork board / white board above my desk
• Committed to waking up when my alarm goes off
• Start work days at 8 (not 9)
• Made daily lists of Big Rock tasks

Predictably, my life has changed measurably since I first embarked upon this path. Most hugely, without the teevee as time sink, my evenings and weekends suddenly seemed longer. After weening myself, and suffering mildly disturbing withdrawal symptoms, I have since rehabilitated and the addiction is gone! I do not think to myself “Man, I wish I could watch ——– tonight.” The urge is purged. The benefits are huge. For example, this past Saturday was spent almost entirely out of the house, errand running, dog walking, park chilling, and in general enjoying my freedom. As it turned out, Saturday was NFL draft day and my beloved Oakland Raiders were picking first. In my teevee days, this would have formed the perfect recipe for stay-home-all-day-and-veg-out behavior. But no more. In fact, I did not even realize it was draft day. Victory!

Still, all is not perfect in Wellsville. As I noted previously, I remain concerned about wasting time, whether napping, reading, or surfing the interwebs. Ironically enough, thanks to one of my favorite time wasters, I came across this nifty new online time tracking tool, Toggl. While Toggl is actually meant to focus on billing time for users with billable hours, I set it up with a few personal categories, which I will use to keep track of the key varieties of my time online: reading, blogging, researching, and watching videos. Also, I have a couple of categories for work and projects that I am working on, as that stuff is important too. The notion here is that by keeping a record of the hours I log doing this or that, I will be aware of how my time is ‘spent’ and then be able to make better judgments about my online activities.
None of these tactics is a silver bullet. But I feel that spending even a little bit of time reflecting on my own life, taking small steps to improve, soon ads up to tangible difference. Simple. And I do have aspirations for much greater achievement. But this is the beginning. And just being more aware of my activities has helped me use my time in more satisfying ways. Let’s see if Toggl keeps moving that bar higher.

I used to make lists of goals on a regular basis, but it has been a while since the last time I\’ve made one. Also, I have a long history studying Covey\’s 7 Habits. Goal setting is part of the 7 Habits; but making goals without some larger framework – that has been on my mind a little bit. In other words, I started asking myself \’do I have to keep setting the same goal over and over?\’

If my whole basis of growth were simply goal-setting, the answer would be \’Yes\’. But thanks to my Covey-oriented framework, I will be working within the concept of Habits, fundamentally different from goal-setting alone. The key is to develop habitual behaviors (being proactive, putting first things first, thinking win-win, etc – each are behaviors that are rooted in essential values, not ephemeral lists).

So while I am momentarily focused on my list of goals, I am doing so within a larger context of developing the habits essential to the advancement of my values and long-term goals. No more wheel-spinning.

Short Term Goals (one or two weeks):

• P – get up when my alarm goes off
• P – create monthly budget
• B – write prioritized to-do list daily
• B – enroll in one class
• H – attend 6 yoga classes

Long Term Goals (this quarter or longer):

• P – read at least one book per month
• P – stick to budget
• B – set up online portfolio
• B – post consistently at design blogs (3x/week)
• B – meet all (accepted) delivery dates
• H – never a week shall pass w/o gym workout

I have a long history of occasionally putting together lists like this, but in the old days they’d sit in a spiral-bound notebook, where they could easily be hidden and then forgotten altogether. No more. This public spectacle is an animal of a different stripe, and meant as a symbolic gesture (to my subconscious) of the seriousness and sincerity of my commitments.

As we all know, if you don’t set goals, you are not likely to achieve them. There are snappier versions of that old truism/cliche but in this case the phrase is apt. What’s more, declaration of such goals to friends and family is a tangible action, and a brings with it a much higher level of awareness than those old notebooks could ever manage (although I have berated myself after re-discovering such lists, after months of neglect).

So here goes. Wish me luck!

This business of setting goals, and focusing on the big rocks is not something to be taken lightly. It takes focus. Currently, there are two categories of goals that are occupying synapses on my cerebral cortex:

1. Household Necessities
2. Higher Callings

Which ones do you think are in the ‘Big Rock’ group? Yes, the Higher Callings. But thus far I have not been able to focus on them, as the Household Necessities are in the damn way: a stack of framed photos in the foyer; an unused turntable I need to flip on craigslist; the unplugged teevee that must be donated asap; a pile of dirty laundry; and a bunch of other similar, petty distractions.

As long as these chores little pebbles remain unfinished scattered about – and quite visible in my apartment – I am having a helluva time navigating to the hall of Big Rocks. Can’t seem to do it. But rather than complain, I’ve decided I’ll just start small (how counter-7 habits of me, I know).

So there we have Goal No. 1: The next 48 hours (work hours excepted) are dedicated to clearing my immediate environment of clutter. Immediately thereafter I will move on to developing my set of Quarterly Goals, followed by an action plan. Also, at some point I might acquire the bible of GTD.

So I kicked it to the curb, got it out of my life. But that is not the end of the story. It is the beginning.

(more after the jump) Here is where I really earn my stripes: what else will change in my life, now that I have removed the lazy box? Of course, there are lots of great ideas as to what one might do after he is released from the cursed teevee life. I have high aspirations for doing lots of things.

But getting things done is not an automatic consequence of teevee removal. Now I begin to work on developing good habits, focusing energies on some key goals, and – toughest of all – being disciplined. With all things, it is not the starting but the finishing that defines our accomplishments. It is the difference between going to the gym for, say, two weeks, rather than making exercise part of your lifestyle.

Step one: select some achievable goals. Okay, this post is more meta, as I don’t have the goals laid out yet, but be assured such a post will follow. Actually, there is one goal that I have already set, and thus far have lived up to it: blogging daily. What I like most about it is that moment when, after posting, I can sit there and enjoy (briefly!) another success (as in, meeting one of my self-determined goals.)

Such positive reenforcement is a huge key to finding the motivation to attack the bigger and harder goals that I have or will set for myself. Financial, fitness, and professional goals are at the top of the agenda, but all of those require commitments an order of magnitude higher than does blogging. Still, meeting my blogging goals has given me both a forum to focus on my self reflection, and a small taste of the rewards of self discipline. But ahead is where the true joy and satisfaction lay, and that is where I am headed: on a journey to the land of the Big Rocks.

Eventually we did buy a telly and used it to watch movies. When Netflix revolutionized the way one could rent movies, we set up a queue and our lives set into an easy pattern: watch two, maybe three movies week; read the local rag, which we loathe 5-7 days a week to keep up on local issues; plug into the hive on a daily basis and consume our media via teh intarweb. We noticed that without daily injections of the hysterical evening news and other serial media that the objects of our desires and wants shifted. Instead of being driven by outside forces, a new voice emerged from inside. Our urges to conspicuously consume waned, our desire for status objects decreased, a need to be like others dwindled. (Of course, we still shop, seek new objects, & find inspiration in others. It’s just more self-directed rather than driven by media.) On the edge is an awareness of how commercial media i.e. media generated by corporations, for corporations, shapes our appetite.

However, not all is peaches and cream. Although I rarely visit corporate websites as the main course of my internet meal, I still spend quite a bit of time plugged in. I have had to make a conscious choice to limit the amount of time I spend with my square-headed girlfriend. A screen is still a screen even if you are pushing different buttons. Although I gain immense amounts of inspiration from the websites I read, I am concerned by how often my intentional reading becomes mindless perusing. I find that I need to leave space in my day for creativity or else my weeks go by and I fell more and more drained until I have to take action to infuse my life with positive energy and reaffirm my goals and bring *my life* back into focus. There is a middle path where we can enjoy the works of others (plays, museums, television shows, movies, music, blogs, concerts, books, zines, &tc) and still be actively and creatively living our own personal lives. That balance is crucial.

Having been single for almost two years, I do not have such a built-in social, erm, network. I have to work for my nights of intimacy, or even just company. It takes effort – you gotta brush your teeth, maybe even shower, and quite possibly spend a bunch of money on food or drinks, to ensure that you and your date/friend/whatever have fun stuff to do together. Usually, you have to leave your house first, even if the whole aim is to get them back to your place.

But sitting home, now that is easy! Especially when your virtual friends with their exciting, edited existences are waiting to be played at your leisure. No need to go to the local cafe, or troll the bars, or volunteer. No. Just pour some chips in a bowl, open the dip, crack a beer, flip the switch, and – BLAU! – entertainment, emotional occupation, and virtual companionship.

The thing is, it’s all an illusion, man. Even the ‘real’ drama of, say Monday Night Football (an actual physical and psychological contest, I mean), is shrouded in hyped-up and melodramatacized versions of human narrative. Athletes become superhuman gods or demonized demons, depending on the announcer’s (or network’s) agenda that evening. Regardless of the format, even if all you watch is, say, National Geographic documentaries, the feed is still an illusion.

Of course, teevee is not alone: you can get wrapped up in romance novels, comic books, video games, blogs (oh no!), porn … whatever. Teevee is the most passive of all these mediums, but taken to an extreme, any of these ‘pursuits’ present the chance to curl in further upon one’s own life, eschewing the real experiences that are what life is truly made of, available to each and every one of us in the densely populated city where we now sit. The further into our little pretend worlds that we entrench ourselves, the more alone we feel.

But we are not alone. Even me – 33, single, and now without my old teevee – neither am I.